Pinned toot

This month is about making an environment which encourages creativity, which for me means moving to writing Discord and a new instance, and off for-profit social media. Planting trees on Forest whenever I'm offline and/or creating.

I've devised a new and efficient way of getting scammers to hang up on me:

(in best Customer Service Phone Voice (tm)): "yes, of course, I'd love for you to show me the problem with my network connection, [name]. Before we start, I'll just have to take you through some security questions: would you be able to tell me my ten-digit customer account number?"

Sofar Sounds gig tonight has changed venue to a church and it's Church of England

This is the second time I've gone and the second time I've hung out with the guy I'm going with, he's straight and I hope he can roll with just how obnoxiously queer about same-sex marriage I'm going to be all night

if I ruin people's nights I hope I ruin people's nights

I sat through my first activism meeting (not counting a student council-ish thing aged 14) and did not bolt despite everyone being impossibly attractive and upbeat and smily

Slowly realising my pathological inability to join things is probably trauma and I should probably work on that 💔

...I've finally done it, got myself into such a queer media bubble that a blockbuster felt viscerally distasteful

I hate sad European dramas about infidelity though, what do I watch to turn my brain off now???

it's LGBT NIMBYism and I won't have it

gonna rub my gay little hands all over every story, and it's gonna be so good for straight men because once homophobia's destroyed they're going to be allowed to have feelings

I'd forgotten they were going to do the cringey pandering "we got this"

I didn't know about "the MCU's first gay moment" and man, that felt MORE othering. Good news, you're allowed to exist and Captain America doesn't hate you! But Cap won't demonstrate for a moment he cares about his best friend, because we heard you're wondering if they're gay and Cap being gay himself???? WELL WE CAN'T HAVE THAT

I don't care about individual ships, I mean Return of the King was box office and critical and Oscar gold and part of how it did that was simply allowing a group of people to care about each other (in addition to! not even instead of!) their offscreen absent girlfriends

Avengers Endgame was so long I got drunk and then I got sober and there was STILL a third act wherein I became INCANDESCENT with rage at how much better a movie it would be if it wasn't afraid of looking gay

This seems obvious but I had to spell it out for a lovely and deeply thoughtful friend whose family had been rich over two generations, that was two years ago and I think about it every time I've ordered in since

PSA: just because a company's running a promotion, doesn't mean its employees are

Tip on the full-price cost of your meal, not the promotional price

Stranger Things 3: A Summary

Max: El is gay but she's gay for me, but she's straight for Mike, and Will's really gay for Mike. And I hate Mike.
Mike: It's not that complicated.

stranger things 

Stranger Things S3 has some good queer energy in Will and Max/El

I mean it's 2019 so I'm waiting for the rumored textual representation as well, but as an 80s pastiche it's pretty perfect

Interview with Prof. Jennifer Grygiel (they/their) in Digital Minimalism!

Whole pages using they pronouns, in a book aimed at college students and tech bros :heart_nb:

People who are actively working on themselves??? People who go to therapy when they can??? People who read advice columns??? People who think about how to be a better, kinder, more interesting person???

y'all are EXTREMELY good

I need more long-distance friends; there are so few monogamous people I can rely on to Get It when I have relationship drama, and I can either date poly people or be friends or end up having relationship drama ABOUT their friends, but one really needs different people for those three things :-/////

Got off twitter and tumblr for 66 hours (my big weaknesses, everything else I'm all right with my usage), and while I'm not a guitar-playing, rock-climbing, novel-writing social butterfly who's unbearably smug about their social media *yet*, I do feel better and I did read things and do mindfulness and feel less like a social hummingbird at the Splenda feeder

Also I now have a Very Competitive Duolingo Buddy to learn Japanese and Italian with so that's cool

70hrs , go go go

I'm nearing the end of Digital Minimalism and some of his ideas are getting...poorly sourced... but what I'm wondering now is - what would a social network look like if its aim wasn't to keep us on that network? Mastodon's better, sure, but what else could we do? Why are dating apps* so iffy at doing their alleged job?

*I specifically mean tinder, probably not coincidentally the most addictive and popular as well as having the worst conversation:date ratio

"...start treating [likes] as poison to your attempts to cultivate a meaningful social life. Put simply, you should stop using them. Don’t click “Like.” Ever. And while you’re at it, stop leaving comments on social media posts as well. No “so cute!” or “so cool!” Remain silent. The reason I’m suggesting such a hard stance against these seemingly innocuous interactions is that they teach your mind that connection is a reasonable alternative to conversation."

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