calamity izzy @izzy@fandom.ink

#introduction time! I'm an #engineer living in the Netherlands with my wife, dog, and cat. We all have fandom names if you count the #shakespeare fandom.

I'm into #sff and #videogames, like: #botw #oot #pokemon #oldkingdom #spiritwalker #nkjemisin #asimov #murderbot #startrek

I also like #hiking and soft #adventure, especially the #grandcanyon and #geocaching.

I guess I'm here because because #snails.

okay but the giant ads at all the bus stops have him in the "sexy action film lady" pose, what am I supposed to think?

baby: (coos)
Jedi Jason Mantzoukas: okay kid, even I know that's a crazy idea.
baby: (warbles)
JJM: but that would be manslaughter!
baby: (burps)
JJM: you're right, it is worth it. let's go

anyway I need Jedi Jason Mantzoukas to be the only one crazy enough to show up and train the baby. like they just have the same whacky chaotic vibe

obsessed with calling the mandalorian "hot daddy"

forever salty that spn took sabriel as a ship name

damnit, I wanna talk about the book!!

that was all years ago. I still get lots of random emails for accounts but I haven't heard from the person they're meant for.

today I receive an email from them, with no subject, that just reads: "can't login"

guess you're fucked, bro

fun story: I have an ancient gmail address. someone else thinks it's theirs and signs up for everything with it. when I get "verify your email" messages, I go into the account and delete it, or change the email and password to something fake.

they've sent me multiple emails asking if I can verify the accounts, or forward the emails to their actual email address (which is very close to mine, with numbers at the end). I said no, you need to learn to use the correct email.

today! it is the day we unpack... THE BOOKS

dog stands up, stretches, lays back down. cat gets up, stretches, lays back down.

I can't get up because my dog and cat are on me.

I'm a simple adult. I see the function "cumsum," I have an appropriate chuckle.

(it's part of python's numpy package and I can only hope it's short for "cumulative sum")

the new house is chilly. the cat is snuggly. it's amazing

nothing has ever confused me more than this vague set of poorly written and drawn instructions. and I took three semesters of quantum physics. I say this not to brag, but to impress upon you just how boggling these instructions were.

whoever made this manual needs to be taken to the nearest IKEA cafeteria and stuffed so full of meatballs that they violently re-think their life choices.

guys. I get it now. PAX is the devil. I honestly built a NORDLI afterward as a palette cleanser.

so having moved means it's time for IKEA, our flat-pack overlords. and like, I love putting that shit together. the wordless instructions are great and it's always been a fun time. I never understood why people hated it.

until this weekend, when I tried to put together the PAX (IKEA's standard wardrobe) sliding doors.

anyway I named my raccoon after my DM. I'm about to figure out how they like it when I call them "Human (Name)" to distinguish them from "Raccoon (Name)".

I really wanted my grave domain cleric, whose order can feign death for 24 hours, to have a possum as a familiar. because they can also feign death.

my DM, bless their soul, was either confused or forgot, and gifted me a raccoon. I'm not mad, just... confused.

The thrilling conclusion: neighborhood wife points out that the cinnamon sugar was right where I had put it, in the drawer with other foodstuffs

Lost cause: area person tries to make cinnamon sugar using only cinnamon and sugar, fails due to mysterious alchemical laws

Tragic: local human breaks down after spending minimal effort looking for cinnamon sugar in their kitchen and finding none